In her new memoir, I’m Glad My Mom Died, Jennette McCurdy has shed some new light on her time at Nickelodeon and further explains why she wants to leave that chapter of her life behind her. She also revealed that Nickelodeon offered her $300,000 in “hush money” if she agreed not to talk publicly about her experiences at the network. A lengthy excerpt from the book was published by Vanity Fair with McCurdy alleging misconduct from someone she chooses not to identify by name, referring to the man as “The Creator.”
In the Vanity Fair story, The “iCarly” and “Sam & Cat” alum details the moment when she first tried alcohol after she was allegedly coerced by The Creator. McCurdy says that she was pressured to take a sip as the “Victorious kids get drunk together all the time,” suggesting that the iCarly kids needed a “little edge.” The Nickelodeon star acquiesced by taking a drink, she says.
“The Creator laughs. I’ve done well. I’ve pleased him. Mission accomplished. It’s the same mission I have every time I get dinner with him, which has gotten more and more frequent lately as my new contract for the spin-off he promised me is being worked out. The Creator is doing the thing that I’ve heard from my co-stars he does with every new star of a show that he’s making—he takes you under his wing. You’re his favorite. For now. I like being his favorite for now. I feel like I’m doing something right.”
McCurdy also details an occasion when The Creator had allegedly placed his hand on her knee, offering her his jacket when he noticed it gave her goosebumps. He then proceeded to allegedly give McCurdy a massage which made her uncomfortable.
“He takes his coat off and drapes it around me. He pats my shoulders and then the pat turns into a massage… My shoulders do have a lot of knots in them, but I don’t want The Creator to be the one rubbing them out. I want to say something, to tell him to stop, but I’m so scared of offending him.”
The excerpt ends with a relieved McCurdy learning that Sam and Cat had been canceled after just one season. On a call with her various lawyers, managers, and agents, McCurdy says her team told her Nickelodeon was also offering her $300,000, of which one of her managers allegedly said, “They’re giving you three hundred thousand dollars, and the only thing they want you to do is never talk publicly about your experience at Nickelodeon.” Following this quote, McCurdy writes, “Specifically related to The Creator.”
“What the f—? Nickelodeon is offering me three hundred thousand dollars in hush money to not talk publicly about my experience on the show? My personal experience of The Creator’s abuse?” she writes. “This is a network with shows made for children. Shouldn’t they have some sort of moral compass? Shouldn’t they at least try to report to some sort of ethical standard?”
McCurdy says she refused the money but jokes that maybe she should have just taken the check.
“Wait… I just turned down three hundred thousand dollars. That’s a lot of money. I’ve made a decent amount on this Sam & Cat spin-off, but definitely not enough that three hundred thousand dollars doesn’t make a difference. Sh*t. Maybe I should’ve taken it.”
The book, which also describes how McCurdy felt “robbed and exploited” by fame, also goes into her resentment and jealousy of Grande, whose burgeoning pop career led to the singer regularly missing work.
“I’m done being a good sport. I resent being a good sport. If I wasn’t such a good sport to begin with, I wouldn’t be in this predicament in the first place. I wouldn’t be on this s— show saying these s— lines on this s— set with this s— hairstyle,” she writes. “Maybe my life would be entirely different right now. I fantasize about it being different. But it’s not different. It’s this. This is what it is. Ariana misses work in pursuit of her music career while I act with a box [for an episode]. I’m pissed about it. And I’m pissed at her. Jealous of her.”
McCurdy’s book, “I’m Glad My Mom Died” publishes August 9. The title alludes to McCurdy’s troubled relationship with her late mother, Debra, who exerted strict measures of control through food, her career and, bodily examinations, according to an interview in The New York Times.